Coping with Prostate Cancer

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Coping with Prostate Cancer

A diagnosis of prostate cancer triggers many emotions. There is fear, uncertainty, anger, anxiety, depression and sometimes self-pity or denial. However, hundreds of thousands of men have lived this same experience. To help ease the way for others, many have shared their experiences in coping with prostate cancer. Here is a summary of what they have to say.

• Thoroughly educate yourself about the disease and treatment options. Knowledge is power. It can help you understand the disease, how it affects you, how to decide the best treatment for you, and what to expect as your treatment progresses. Initially, a diagnosis may leave you feeling powerless and at the mercy of the disease. However, the more you know about prostate cancer, the more you can take control of it and your future.

• Be receptive to emotional support from family and friends. After being diagnosed with prostate cancer, don't try to be the strong, silent type. You will benefit from the help and support of those around you. They will likely benefit by giving support to you. You will become united in fighting the disease.

• Remember that prostate cancer is often a "couple's disease." Don't shut out your partner. Your disease is also your partner's problem. Your partner should be part of your doctor visits and involved in your treatment decisions. The more your partner shares your experience and hears your feelings, the more support your partner can provide.

• Remember that prostate cancer is not the end of your masculinity. The fact that the prostate gland is critical to your sexual function may cause you fear and anxiety about the possibility of losing your masculinity. Educate yourself so that you can make the best health decisions possible. Treatment considerations vary, as do their effects on sexual function. The good news is that prostate cancer is very treatable and loss of sexual function is not inevitable. Even when erectile dysfunction results from prostate cancer treatment, there are medical advances that can treat the problem.


• Seek out support groups. There are many prostate cancer support groups for both patients and partners. Check with health care providers and community organizations for groups in your area. The Internet can be used for finding information and emotional support. Prostate cancer does not make you an outcast. It does qualify you to join a unique group of people who draw strength from one another.

• Be honest with yourself and your physician. You need to build a partnership with your doctor. That takes straight talk. It is normal to consider a second opinion and investigate all of the care options available to you. Your doctor will understand getting a second opinion to confirm the diagnosis, or to provide a different perspective on treatment options.

• Above all, become an advocate for your personal health care.

• Don't be afraid to ask for professional or emotional help. You need a positive attitude to fight prostate cancer. If depression or a feeling of hopelessness becomes overwhelming, seek professional help.

• Don't stop learning about the disease. Prostate cancer diagnosis and treatment options are continually changing as new advances and discoveries are made. Continue to seek new information and keep abreast of recent findings and studies that may be beneficial.


Hear from survivors
"Knowing I had prostate cancer was a real blast of reality, and produced the probably common 'Why ME?' sad-sack response for a couple of days. It was not pleasant to know the PSA test, the DRE examination, and the biopsies all said 'CANCER.'

"After realizing that 'ME' was no different from everybody else, the old failure analysis procedures kicked in. My business has always been telling customers what was wrong with their 'product', and why it wore out too soon or broke unexpectedly in service. The second part of the work was my recommending corrective action for their consideration. It finally occurred to me that I'm very much alive, and there were some obvious corrective actions that could be taken, and I could damn well beat it if I stopped feeling sorry for myself and would get out and DO something."


"The 'DO' something at that point was a review of my specific prostate cancer situation, comparing the advantages and disadvantage percentages for each option, and from that, making a decision as to what I was specifically going to do to beat the prostate cancer."

"I guess the critical points I had to go through were that denial wasn't going to do me one bit of good, and it was time to face the situation before it went spontaneously critical and became totally deadly."

- Prostate cancer survivor

"You are no less a man because you have prostate cancer and the treatment has affected your sex drive and the one you love physically. There are other ways to show our partners we love them in the most intimate private ways but I find that it is almost always her initiating the foreplay that kick starts me into action. If she doesn't do that I am happy to sit and be a couch potato or work at the computer and I am "O.K." while sadly, I forget too easily that she is NOT."











"Love, discussion and setting out to make things happen are the only way through this and that is easier said than done. Do it and it is so wonderful. Sit back and there is a real danger of everything slipping away from our reach."

- Prostate cancer survivor

"Within three or four weeks of surgery, my libido - 'the sexual desire' -- was back to normal. I have had no decrease whatsoever in my desire to have sex. I want to remind you that each person's experience is different. I have shared my experience. With time, patience, and understanding, sex after [prostate treatment] can be very satisfying."










- Prostate cancer survivor